Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
