I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
