I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Randomize