Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
