doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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