I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize