just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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