he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize