so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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