I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
