she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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