I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
