if you like me you must not know who I am
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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