too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
