guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
