Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
