So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
