My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
