She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
