Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
