Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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