i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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