that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
