You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
