I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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