I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
