3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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