She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
