Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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