I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
