im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
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