pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
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