She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
