took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize