i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
