Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
