ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
