dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
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Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
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At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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