oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
