she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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