my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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