yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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