Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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