just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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