Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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