I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
