big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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