Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
