Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize