I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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