I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
