okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
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