those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize