And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize